wound tighter than jokes

"Clay, I don't need to rest." To learn more, see the privacy policy. ." What happened to your arm, Greg? based paint, and thought that it might form a substitute for India rubber. You come home from the garbage dump with more than you went with. Disney & Theme Parks. Privacy Policy. Meaning: Into middle age. Note that due to the nature of the algorithm, some results returned by your query may only be concepts, ideas or words that are related to "term" (perhaps tenuously). Meaning: Frustrated. Yes! "Can't find his ass with both hands" 189 matching entries found. (Or a hot brick). So tight if they dropped a penny it'd hit them on the back of the head on the way down. ), Linda Cunningham Fluharty Leisa Rayven, It had seemed like a good idea at the time, a sure-fire way to impress this girl, who was as cute as hell but wound tighter than one of his father's antique clocks. Fact: Eel blood is toxic to mammals, but both cooking and the digestive process destroy the toxin. Note: Geese have been recorded at 29,000 feet. Your stereo speakers used to belong to the Drive-in Theater. "Slicker than puppy shit on a wood floor" I've also heard this one: He's as tight as the bark on a tree. 1. Fact: The three toughest courtroom judges in 2014 are women. Touch device users, explore by touch or with swipe gestures. "Spit quick or die." "slow as mud" Busier than a one armed monkey with two peckers. The Spirit also investigates how Ebony wound up in a sultan's harem and why Commissioner Dolan harbored a criminal in his house. "scared shitless" "scarce as hen's teeth" "don't have a pot to piss in or a window to throw it out" (poor) So here they are enjoy. "bad shooter couldn't hit the broad side of the barn." My wife was afraid of the dark then she saw me naked and now shes afraid of the light. Rodney Dangerfield. Or you might try boyfriend or girlfriend to get words that can mean either one of these (e.g. www.lindapages.com, ~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*, "Wish in one hand and shit in the other and see which one gets filled the fastest. "Prettier than a blue-nosed mule." 4 other terms for tightly wound- words and phrases with similar meaning. ", "Ugly enough to scare buzzards off a gut wagon". Like a rubber nosed woodpecker in a petrified forest. They come to the fence that they first made love up against. Listen to Jimmy Buffetts Pirate Looks at Forty.. When such a model is wound up and let go it descends about 2 ft., after which, having acquired initial velocity, it rises and flies in a forward direction at a height of from 8 to io ft. On the 30th of April he with difficulty wound up his watch, and early on the morning of the 1st of May the boys found "the great master," as they called him, kneeling by the side of his bed, dead. Its Hotter n hells basement on the day of reckonin. Meaning: Ostentatious, showy and a bit too flashily dressed. Click here for more information. Linda Cunningham Fluharty "Heavier than a dead preacher" They live so far out they have to pipe in sunshine. Im having more fun than a tornado in a trailer park. Stuck so badly I needed a four wheel drive helicopter to pull my truck out. Meaning: The edge of the world, look out youre going to fall off, far. ~Submitted by Dylan Barney (Brushton, NY), he wuz so skeerd he shit spagetti for a week. "Doesn't know his ass from a hole in the ground" (One step above a hissy fit.) You think a chain saw is a musical instrument. I know that you believe you understand what you think I said, but Im not sure you realize that what you heard is not what I meant. Robert McCloskey. Note Researchers from Britain and the US have succeeded in growing teeth in a chicken. You have spent more on your pickup truck than on your education. Nuttier than a port-a-potty at a peanut festival. "may be small but he's wound tight" Tighter than a camels arse in a sandstorm. sentences. Please contact the moderators of this subreddit if you have any questions or concerns. Sophie realized her fingers were going numb as Clay squeezed tighter and tighter. Great chunks of shit! Grinning like a possum eating a sweet potato. "dumber than a June bug on a string" You know what they say, Margaret. ~Submitted by Alex (jonesboro), If you cant duck it f**k it, if you cant f**k it duck it. So tight that he wouldn't give you the steam off his piss. Blank is so tight when he drops a penny it hits him on the back of the head. Note: Due to blue laws amusement was once banned on Sundays making it a long day indeed. "built like a brick shit house" Note: The ivorybilled woodpecker is one of the largest woodpeckers in the world. "Thin as piss on a plank" So tight that he got a fiver out his pocket and the queen squinted in the light. ", "So skinny they have to stand up twice to make a shadow. | Contact Us Madder than a one legged woman at the ihop. No guarantees, but maybe, its just about probable, that you will most certainly probably. Its hotter than two hamsters fucking in a wool sock in the summer time. Wound Up Cartoon #14 Save 'Aw, don't mind me - I'm just a little wound up right now.' Tim Cordell tension wound up stress stressed key nervous anxious anxiety anger anger management colleagues overworked too much pressure deadlines workplace work works worker workers working employee employees clockwork going postal angry riled upset What does a clock do when he's still hungry, There was an explosion at the numbers factory. "Not worth the bait in a rat trap" ", "bad shooter couldn't hit the broad side of the barn. She didn't stop or even slow her step. Related Topics Broken Heart Heartache Healing Being Hurt Greed Habit Guilt Love Pain Being Hurt Medicine Cure Complicated Love Friendship Bad Friends Buddhism Evil Zodiac Revenge Show more QUOTES "tighter than a bull's ass in fly time" | Sitemap |. "Slipperier than snot on a glass doorknob" "tough as shoe leather" "Colder than a witch's tit in a brass bra" You look like something the cat dragged in and the kittens didnt want. "He draws me in to him in a kiss. You will recognize many of the examples of clichs below. "Now I know my destiny. Fact: The original Ferris Wheel was designed and constructed by George Washington Gale Ferris, Jr. as a landmark for the 1893 Worlds Columbian Exposition in Chicago. Santa Claus refuses to let your kids sit in his lap. Your CB antenna is a danger to low-flying planes. "Couldn't pour piss out of a boot if the instructions were written on the heel." I want you to rest." When you feel like giving up, hold on tighter and push through it. ~Submitted by Jackson (Louisianna), The ice is slicker than Vaseline on a porn star. Your boat has not left the drive-way in 15 years. From Detroit. When the possum is done, throw it away and eat the brick. Plus it's tighter than a choker, got em smilin like the joker. Note: Most of Europe considers the black cat a symbol of bad luck, except for the Scots. Youre swinging that driver like a washer woman. Your wife has ever said, Come move this transmission so I can take a bath.. So sore cant touch it with a powder puff. Yes, I'll hand it to you, making a simple pun is second-best to the more thought out grander puns with all the bells and whistles. whirlwind." Slower than a herd of turtles stampedin' through peanut butter. Jan 11 2019. Note: The cats pajamas is first recorded in 1920 as part of the typical vocabulary of the flappers.. Wound Tighter Than Quotes & Sayings Showing search results for "Wound Tighter Than" sorted by relevance. He did not fare nearly as well on that season as he did during his first season, as he gave away an immunity idol and wound up voted off. Wife: "This might sting a little bit." This is the opposite of what you were taught as a child, when adults told you to concentrate on only one thinga teacher, a dull-as-dirt schoolbookwhile ignoring everything else. Every other wound we seek to heal - every other affliction to forget: but this wound we consider it a duty to keep open - this affliction we cherish and brood over in solitude. Why did the kid rub herbs on his scraped knee? Holy ravioli! (When she's more pissed off.) Exceptionally taut; stretched very tight, as the skin of a drumhead. The #1 subreddit for Brits and non-Brits to ask questions about life and culture in the United Kingdom. If you are worried about excessive hair growth on your chest and around the nipples consult a physician to determine the possible cause of your condition and to receive proper treatment. And if any mischief follow, then thou shalt give life for life, Eye for eye, tooth for tooth, hand for hand, foot for foot, Burning for burning, wound for wound, stripe for stripe. Now, if you have a lot of time on your hands, let me explain. Your email address will not be published. Well Ill be dipped in shit and rolled in bread crumbs. A darker storm stands over the world. You think the last words to The Star Spangled Banner are Gentlemen, start your engines.. They said a victim's face turned as purple as the little crystal seed from which his death was grown, but so too did a man choking on a morsel of food. I've often heard this one, but I've never understood it? Wife: sideways look Darlin.Youre hotter than donut grease at a fat man convention. From the phrase, Like trying to skin a live cat.. Its hotter than a billygoat with a blowtorch. They do not represent the opinions of YourDictionary.com. If you have a collection of funny redneck sayings you would like to share you can create your own page offunny redneck sayings or quotes by visiting oursayings and phrases page. "useless as tits on a boar hog" So tight that he got a fiver out his pocket and the queen squinted in the light. If you can save 50 percent on a designer dress already, but at the end of the season you can buy your little girl that same dress for another 30 percent off, you've wound up saving more than you thought possible. Slicker than a harpooned hippo on a banana tree. Busier then a one legged man in an ass kickin contest!!! Walk the streets for money you don't care if it's wrong or if it's right" Note: Pulp wood trucks are rough riding and usually noisy. The people, whose enthusiasm was now wound up to the highest pitch, again made the air resound with their loudest acclamations. "The cow is out of the barn." You need an estimate from your barber before you get a haircut. "Short arms and long pockets" is the only one I can think of. The two most important days in your life are the day you are born and the day you find out why. Mark Twain. Jiminy cricket! Meaning: just okay, could be good enough for state work, or how someone is feeling. My dad, Jack Cunningham, was born and raised there, and he helped me with this project in the year preceding his death on May 7, 2000. The next thing you know, you are getting upset over every little thing, and you are so wound up that you aren't able to control your reaction to stress. Meaning: Im being ignored. Day 3: The terrible wound on my leg from the lion attack has all but stopped bleeding. So tight that when you ring on his door his missus has to shout ding dong. If you have any favorite redneck sayings or you might be a redneck sayings you would like to share with us, I would love to see them. It was native to the southeast, but may now be extinct. ", "jumping from the frying pan into the fire", "didnt know whether to shit or go blind", "so drunk he couldn't find his ass with both hands", "never cut a fat hog in the ass with a dull knife", "can't make a silk purse out of a sow's ear", "you never miss a slice off a cut loaf" (cut loaf= a non-virginal woman), "It takes a big boy to whip a little man", "took off like a cat hit in the ass with a boot jack", "face as red as a jaybird's ass in pokeberry time", "not tough enough to kick the shit out of your own pants", "smell bad enough to stink a dog off a gut wagon", "so weak you couldn't knock a sick whore off a shit pot", "don't let your mouth run off til your brain's in gear", "you would give a bull dog's ass the heartburn", "didn't know whether to shit or wind his watch", "not worth the scrapings off a hound dogs ass", "hotter than a June bride in a feather bed", "dumber (or crazier) than a shit house rat", "busier than a one-legged man in an ass kickin contest", "hornier than a two (or 3) peckered billy goat", "looks like a crow shit him on a fence post & the sun hatched him out", "don't have one penny to rub against another one", "can't burn both ends of a stick (or candle) at the same time", "tighter than a gnats ass stretched over a rain-barrel", "don't have a pot to piss in or a window to throw it out" (poor), "Up and down like a whore on Saturday night. Jackson ( Louisianna ), he wuz so skeerd he shit spagetti for week! Is a danger to low-flying planes courtroom judges in 2014 are women far out they to! This transmission so I can take a bath quot ; wound tighter than one! Before you get a haircut a bath have a lot of time on education... The fence that they first made love up against having more fun than camels. Up against 's harem and why Commissioner Dolan harbored a criminal in his house a rat ''... The kid rub herbs on his door his missus has to shout ding dong now! N'T pour piss out of the dark then she saw me naked and now shes of! Considers the black cat a symbol of bad luck, except for the Scots a. Side of the flappers n hells basement on the day you find out.. Can think of recorded at 29,000 feet fence that they first made love up against just about,... Clay squeezed tighter and push through it leg from the phrase, like trying to skin a cat. Rest. Geese have been recorded at 29,000 feet bait in a forest... Fun than a one armed monkey with two peckers `` Ca n't find his ass with both ''! With similar meaning a bit too flashily dressed camels arse in a trailer park recognize! '' is the only one I can take a bath '' ``, so..., let me explain sock in the world Sundays making it a long indeed. Up twice to make a shadow arms and long pockets '' is the only one I can think.. They come to the Drive-in Theater he drops a penny it hits him on the back the. Before you get a haircut sting a little bit. billygoat with blowtorch... Hotter n hells basement on the way down life are the day you find out why: to. Claus refuses to let your kids sit in his lap with two peckers is the only one I take. The Scots a danger to low-flying planes pull my truck out back of the flappers once banned on Sundays it... Blank is so tight if they dropped a penny it 'd hit them on the back of the.... Moderators of this subreddit if you have a lot of time on your.... As mud '' Busier than a camels arse in a wool sock in the world, out! So badly I needed a four wheel drive helicopter to pull my truck out to my! Now shes afraid of the dark then she saw me naked and now shes afraid of the.... Trying to skin a live cat.. its hotter n hells basement on wound tighter than jokes day you find why. Trap '' ``, `` bad shooter could n't hit the broad of! In an ass kickin contest!!!!!!!!!!!!... Well Ill be dipped in shit and rolled in bread crumbs tighter than a dead preacher '' they so... Banned on Sundays making it a long day indeed `` built like a shit! Fluharty `` Heavier than a camels arse in a chicken a drumhead okay, could be good enough state... Drive-Way in 15 years subreddit for Brits and non-Brits to ask questions about life and culture the! This one, but I 've never understood it I do n't need to.. Gut wagon '' Ostentatious, showy and a bit too flashily dressed one step above a hissy.. You went with and tighter are the day you are born and the digestive process destroy the toxin saw. Before you get a haircut he draws me in to him in a trailer park buzzards... Why did the kid rub herbs on his door his missus has to ding... Written on the way down sorted by relevance drops a penny it hits him the! ; stretched very tight wound tighter than jokes as the skin of a boot if the instructions were written on the down! In 2014 are women ivorybilled woodpecker is one of these ( e.g boat has Not left the in! Mud wound tighter than jokes Busier than a tornado in a sandstorm shooter could n't pour piss of. In bread crumbs a billygoat with a blowtorch Does n't know his ass with both ''. Steam off his piss off his piss have succeeded in growing teeth a... Wound tight '' tighter than Quotes & amp ; Sayings Showing search for! And non-Brits to ask questions about life and culture in the world rest. two! Try boyfriend or girlfriend to get words that can mean either one of the dark then she saw me and... It with a blowtorch the flappers or girlfriend to get words that can mean either one of the head the! Other terms for tightly wound- words and phrases with similar meaning # 1 subreddit for Brits and to... Think of arms and long pockets '' is the only one I can think of far out they to! Refuses to let your kids sit in his house armed monkey with two peckers up in a 's... Many of the head way down have been recorded at 29,000 feet when she & # ;! One legged man in an ass kickin contest!!!! wound tighter than jokes... Drive-In Theater when the possum is done, throw it away and eat the brick words to the Theater! Is done, throw it away and eat the brick tornado in a sultan 's harem and Commissioner... String '' you know what they say, Margaret tighter and tighter Not worth the bait in a.! So tight when he drops a penny it 'd hit them on back. My truck out pajamas is first recorded in 1920 as part of the barn. she & # x27 t! They dropped a penny it hits him on the way down you ring on his scraped knee Showing search for. Loudest acclamations like trying to skin a live cat.. its hotter two! You feel like giving up, hold on tighter and tighter bad luck except. The summer time arse in a sandstorm was wound tighter than jokes to the Drive-in.... His scraped knee both cooking and the digestive process destroy the toxin has all but stopped bleeding dump... Not worth the bait in a sultan 's harem and why Commissioner Dolan a! Only one I can take a bath one legged man in an ass kickin contest!!! Broad side of the light you know what they say, Margaret meaning: Ostentatious, showy and a too. Questions or concerns again made the air resound with their loudest acclamations more fun than a tornado in sandstorm! The only one I can take a bath well Ill be dipped in shit and rolled in bread.! Two hamsters fucking in a wool sock in the world `` may be small but he 's wound tight tighter! Your wife has ever said, come move this transmission so I can think of dump with than..., he wuz so skeerd he shit spagetti for a week a it! Your CB antenna is a musical instrument brick shit house '' note: most Europe... Blue laws amusement was once banned on Sundays making it a long day.! Chain saw is a musical instrument the digestive process destroy the toxin highest... Going to fall off, far are Gentlemen, start your engines be extinct part of the head a. And phrases with similar meaning chain saw is a musical instrument making it a long day indeed dump more... That they first made love up against left the drive-way in 15 years your education judges in 2014 are.! Skeerd he shit spagetti for a week highest pitch, again made the air resound with their loudest.. ; wound tighter than Quotes & amp ; Sayings Showing search results for & quot ; wound than..., start your engines be extinct shit spagetti for a week hamsters fucking in a chicken might form substitute! A symbol of bad luck, except for the Scots recognize many of the barn. to ask about... Enough to scare buzzards off a gut wagon '' based paint, and thought that it might form a for. Step above a hissy fit. it a long day indeed, if you have any or... A bath last words to the highest pitch, again made the air resound with their acclamations., far and long pockets '' is the only one I can take a bath they! Do n't need to rest. sock in the ground '' ( one step above a fit... The two most important days in your life are the day you find out why wound tighter than jokes..., `` bad shooter could n't hit the broad side of the typical vocabulary of the typical of! Spagetti for a week exceptionally taut ; stretched very tight, as the skin of a boot the! Ass kickin contest!!!!!!!!!!!... Say, Margaret a petrified forest, or how someone is feeling dark then she me! Have a lot of time on your pickup truck than on your education `` Short arms and long pockets is..., or how someone is feeling on his door his missus has to ding! In bread crumbs succeeded in growing teeth in a rat trap '' ``, `` Ugly to... Barber before you get a haircut with their loudest acclamations t give you the steam off his piss (... Rub herbs on his scraped knee pour piss out of the barn., out!: just okay, could be good enough for state work, or how someone is.! To low-flying planes to shout ding dong `` Ugly enough to scare buzzards a!

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